Imagine, I get stopped today on Mountain View Avenue doing 75kmh in a 50kmh zone. And I wasn’t going to drive that way but my passenger, who shall remain nameless, suggested that I drive that way.

So now I have find J$5,000 to pay by 13th May.

I was pissed. This is the second time I have got a ticket in my life. The first one, I gave it to somebody who knew somebody and it disappeared. The fine is bad and not too bad, but to have 2 points added to my licence, means there is now a blemish on my so far perfect record!

The policeman say come to court if I want to contest the ticket. How ah going to contest it? Me never did look pon di speedometer. And in this new Volvo, you only have to press your foot down a likkle and it gone up to 80kmh just like that.

After the ticket, I drove at what I thought was a slow speed, looked on the speedometer and it was saying 60!

How does the bun come in? Comfort food for this distressing, life changing event!

So the blog will accept annoymous posters…..just for Dr D.

Oonu si how mi nice?

Posting will resume on the Original Yamfoot from next Monday. The memorial service for Keith Hammond will be held this Saturday. Using my blog has been my way of paying my respects so I won’t be going to that service. I don’t think they have a church big enough to hold all the people who will be there.

You remember that movie with Sandra Bullock? She was voted Miss Congeniality and went on to win.

Same thing in Miss Jamaica Universe. Miss Congeniality won. Rachelle Wright. From I heard the interview segment that was my winner. She was intelligent and very comfortable. This was unlike Shavoy Gordon who tied for third. She was told that she had 60 seconds to market jamaica. She said something like this.

“We gave you Bob Marley, the Bobsled team and recently Veronica Campbell, and I want to be a part of that legacy”.

Terrible.

Another was asked if she was banished from jamaica, which country she would want to go to. She responded by saying..

“If I was abolished from Jamaia…..”

Rachel )not sure of spelling) was asked about how she would improve basic education in Jamaica and she said the first thing would be to start with the parents so that they understand that education is important, that they must get involved in their kids’ education, that they must send kids to school etc. Very good response I thought.

I got the feeling that Mad Bull’s pick (wink) thought she would have been the runaway winner. She tied for third only.

I could be a judge cause I picked number 1 and number 2, Shaunelle Blake who also won Most Aware and Most Photogenic.

The production was terrible. Very cheap. Not grand at all.

I say….give me a contestant’s body, and I would win hands down!!!

I think it was Mad Bull or Dr D who commented on the lack of quality of this year’s batch of contestants. I just here watching the show and boy oh boy were they right.

There should be a law against beauty contestants who have cellulite entering.

The one or two that have a passable face, have body issues.

I went to a talk yesterday given by the Executive Director of the National Aids committee for Jamaica. After a little exercise she did, it made me think that sex is really not worth the risks, so that’s it. Lock down, turn off, retire.

She gave 4 people a piece of paper each. One had the letter S, one G, one C and one P. She had told us not to open it until she said.

Then she made us meet and greet each other at the start. Then she explained that that was similar to us having sex with other people. I had the letter S, which meant Syphillis. So everybody whose hand I shook, caught syphillis from me. G was for Gonorhea so everybody whose hand that person shook caught Gonorhea. C was for Condom. That person was safe, so they didnt catch anything and P was for pregnant.

So that illustrated how sexual diseases, including HIV are spread. So when you have sex with one person, you not just having sex with that person, but rather with everybody else that the partner has slept with as well!

I had known this of course, but the way it was illustrated really brought it home to me.

It’s just not worth it. Of course if you are what you think to be a monogamous relationship, it’s not so bad. But how do you know? You don’t, unless you watch your partner 24/7, which is impractical.

So you get my reasoning for the lockdown now?

How can somebody call somebody else’s house at 10 to 6 in the morning, and it’s not an emergency?

I go to bed late when I’m here, because when the house is quiet from about 10 to midnight, is when I can get a lot of reading and so on done. Last night I went to bed at 1:00 am, only to have the phone ring at 10 to 6.

Do you know what it was? A book had been lent to a lady, and she was calling to say thanks very much and how useful it was!!!!!!!

But I know she lives ‘cross the waters’ where they get up from all 4:00am, so she must be figure that everybody else gets up that early!!!!

I was not pleased, to say the least.

That is the motto of the high school I went to…St Hugh’s High School for Girls.

This evening, the past students association had a concert in recognition of past principal Miss Marjorie Thomas. She was the onlly principal I had and when Galliwasp called to say they were having it, I immediately launced off into my encounter with her. She said that’s exactly what she wanted me to do…..go up and talk about Miss Thomas.

So I went, and my story was about how, at the end of lower sixth, she called me into her office and said very slowly and calmly that having looked on my report, she was recommending that I repeat lower sixth form. How my ears stung me that day! I said that first, to have been called into her office was frightening because I went through all of school without a demerit or detention.

I made the point this evening that Miss Thomas was very calm and ‘matter-of-fact’ about it and it made it more palatable.

Then I said I had the best of both worlds because I met some lovely people in the set coming up who I joined, and I still knew the girls ahead of me. It also taught me not to think that I can sail through life just so all the time. Sometimes it will catch up with you.

Karen Smith, a past student and very popular singer in Jamaica, entertained, so did another past student Joy Brown, and a guy Dwight Richards (not a past student unless he went to Kingston College!

So that was how I spent my evening. It was long, but it was great seeing people who were at school with me, once again.